Why Do I Drink More Than I Planned To
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You tell yourself you will have one or two. Then the evening goes on, another drink appears, and before you know it you have had far more than you meant to. The next morning brings a headache, patchy memories, or a sinking feeling of regret. You promise yourself next time will be different, and sometimes it is, but often it is not.
Many people occasionally drink more than planned. When it happens regularly, or when setting limits feels harder and harder, it is worth looking at what is going on. Noticing the pattern is an important first step.
If you drink heavily every day, stopping suddenly can cause dangerous withdrawal, including seizures. Talk to a doctor before cutting down, and seek emergency care or call 911 if you have confusion, shaking, hallucinations, or seizures. If you are having thoughts of suicide, call or text 9-8-8.
It Could Be a Lot of Things
Social settings. Parties, work events, and friends who drink heavily can make it easy to keep going, especially when glasses are topped up without you noticing.
Stress relief. Using alcohol to decompress after a hard day can gradually increase how much you need to feel relaxed, as described in Why Do I Rely on Alcohol to Unwind. The same pattern can happen with cannabis used to relax every night.
Social anxiety. Alcohol can ease nerves in social situations, which can lead to drinking more to stay comfortable.
Impulsivity and ADHD. Difficulty stopping once you start, or making impulsive decisions you later regret, can make limits harder to keep.
Low mood. Drinking to numb sadness, loneliness, or grief can lead to heavier use.
Tolerance. Over time, the body gets used to alcohol, so it takes more to feel the same effect.
When It Looks More Like an Alcohol Use Problem
Alcohol use disorder exists on a spectrum from mild to severe. One of its key signs is regularly drinking more, or for longer, than you intended. Other signs include:
- Wanting to cut down but finding it hard.
- Spending a lot of time drinking or recovering from drinking.
- Strong cravings for alcohol.
- Drinking affecting work, relationships, or responsibilities.
- Giving up activities you enjoy because of drinking.
- Drinking in risky situations, such as before driving.
- Needing more alcohol to get the same effect, or feeling unwell when you stop.
Canada's Guidance on Alcohol and Health suggests that risks increase with every drink, and that having more than two drinks per week carries increasing health risks. You do not need to meet criteria for a disorder to benefit from cutting back.
What Can Help
- Decide before you start. Set a clear limit, and tell someone you trust what it is.
- Pace and alternate. Drink slowly and alternate alcoholic drinks with water or alcohol-free options.
- Track your drinking. Writing down what you drink can reveal patterns you did not notice.
- Plan for triggers. Notice situations, people, or feelings that lead to heavier drinking, and plan alternatives.
- Try a break. A period without alcohol can show how much it has been affecting your sleep, mood, and energy.
Getting Support at Pacific Maple Psych Centre
If you are drinking more than you want to, therapy can help without judgement. Support can help you understand what drives your drinking, address stress, anxiety, or low mood, and build strategies that fit your goals, whether that is cutting back or stopping.
Pacific Maple Psych Centre offers individual therapy for alcohol use, stress, and anxiety, in Vancouver and virtually across British Columbia.
Book a SessionCommon Questions About Drinking More Than Planned
Why do I always drink more than I plan to?
Drinking more than intended can come from social settings, stress, social anxiety, impulsivity, low mood, or tolerance. When it happens regularly, it can be a sign of a developing alcohol use problem.
Is drinking more than I intended a sign of alcohol use disorder?
Regularly drinking more or for longer than intended is one of the recognized signs of alcohol use disorder. A professional can help assess your drinking in context.
How many drinks are low risk according to Canadian guidance?
Canada's Guidance on Alcohol and Health suggests that two drinks or fewer per week carries low risk, and risks increase with each additional drink. Less is better for health.
How can I stick to a drinking limit at social events?
Decide your limit before you go, pace yourself, alternate with non-alcoholic drinks, keep track, and have a plan for leaving or saying no. Telling a friend your limit can help.
Is it dangerous to stop drinking suddenly?
For people who drink heavily every day, stopping suddenly can cause serious withdrawal, including seizures. Talk to a doctor before cutting down if you drink heavily.
Can anxiety make me drink more?
Yes. Alcohol can temporarily ease anxiety, which can lead to relying on it more. Over time, alcohol tends to worsen anxiety, especially the day after drinking.
Why do I feel so anxious the day after drinking?
Alcohol affects brain chemistry, and as it wears off, the nervous system can rebound into a more anxious state. Poor sleep and regret about the night before can add to this.
Does ADHD make it harder to control drinking?
People with ADHD may find it harder to stop once they start because of impulsivity and a stronger pull toward immediate rewards. Support can help build strategies.
Do I need to stop completely or can I cut back?
It depends on your goals, health, and pattern of drinking. Some people do well cutting back, while others find stopping easier. A professional can help you decide.
What kind of therapy helps with drinking too much?
Cognitive behavioural therapy, motivational interviewing, and other approaches can help people understand triggers, build coping strategies, and change drinking patterns.